I wrote this post about a month ago, but never posted it. I decided to finally post. We responded to ICBF in April and have been waiting 8 weeks for a reply.
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This is hard.
There is no other way to slice it.
I am weak.
There is no other way to say it.
We heard back from ICBF in Colombia about 2 months ago.
They have concerns.
They aren't sure why we would want to adopt siblings when we already have children.
They think our home is too small.
They think we don't have enough.
Sigh.
What stops most people from considering adoption? Money.
And it stopped us for a few years because we didn't meet the USCIS (US immigration) guidelines.
But then we did.
We were no longer stopped.
And so we pulled a dossier together, got approvals from all over the place.
And now we are told that we aren't rich enough. Our home isn't large enough. We already have two children.
It's hard.
We wonder why would God want us to say yes to three if Colombia is going to say no?
Why is our dossier in Colombia when it could be somewhere else with a yes?
Why are we fully funded when we could be years away from a referral and others need money right now?
How did we choose Colombia when adoption is changing so much there?
There are no answers.
But
I know this hard is nothing compared to the hard of being without a family.
I know His ways are not mine.
I know His grace is sufficient when I am a just a weakling.
If I could, I would not choose a path with things done
in my way
or
in my time
because looking back through my life, His plan has always been better. Best.
But it's still hard.
UGH! What I do so enjoy about your blog is that you keep it real, Ami (or Amy on
legal documents). š Even in the tough stuff. In doing that you let us have the privilege to know to pray.
And we get to be in on the miracle.
My heart goes out to you and your family, Ami.
I pray God brings you peace and comfort and clarity and discernment as you go on from here. God sees and knows your heart and will use you.
Ami,
My prayers go out to you and your family. We have four adopted children and were told we were too old, wrong race and too big of a family. God had plans and we have adopted children…not the ones we thought that were to be ours but the ones that God planned. I am so glad that you can voice that God is in control…I found that to be so helpful even when I didn't "feel" it…I knew it. Be sure to spend extra special time with the children you have in your home while you wait…God may need to build your base family stronger before bringing this new blessing into your home…whatever the reason, keep God as your focus, followed by your family and then your ministry to others. God is so good and He does love you and the child that He is bringing to you!
Ami,
i am so sorry this has happened to you. We adopted 2 sibling groups from Colombia. There were many ups and downs The program has had problems for the last couple years.
Both of our sibling groups we adopted were not what we asked for. Each time God had other plans and His ways are perfect. Our blog is eightisnotenough.blogspot.com
If you would like to ask questions you may email me at jimnbettyporter@gmail.com